“I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don’t have to respect anybody.” ― George Burns (at 100 years) When you think a fastball is coming, you gotta be ready to hit the curve.” ― Jaja Q They’re strands of birthday glitter growing out of your head! Happy Birthday!” “Humans are the only species, who cut trees, make paper from it and then write on this paper “Save the trees”” ![]() “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” ― Abraham Lincoln “ Photography without seeing would be like eating without tasting.” ― David McKay, Photography Demystified Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.” ― Paulo Coelho “Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. “I don’t have a funny bone in my body now I know why my surgeon’s bills are so high.” ― Rory R. “You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” The friend who never hears from you may grow indifferent.” “Strong as they are, friendship often reviving. “If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?” ― Albert Einstein “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito.” ― Bette Reese If you’re alive, it isn’t.” ― Richard Bach “Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. “Life is a hurdle race, the winner has to cross all the hurdles and still maintain enthusiasm.” ― M.K. “Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that.” “Everyone complains about lack of money, but none complain about a lack of brains.” ― Jewish Proverb That is why he made so many of them.” ― Abraham Lincoln “If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.” ― Maya Angelou “Establishing goals is all right if you don’t let them deprive you of interesting detours.” ― Doug Larsen “The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” ― Eckhart Tolle “I have been putting a lot of thought into it and I just don’t think being an adult is gonna work for me.” “God gave us mouths that close and ears that don’t – that should tell us something.” ― Eugene O Neil “If you ever get caught sleeping at work, just slowly raise your head and say “In Jesus Name I Pray”.” “The best way to teach yourself about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream.” ― Bill Murray “They are ill discoverers that think there is no land when they see nothing but sea.” ― Francis Bacon “It is a common delusion that you can make things better by talking about them.” ― Rose MacAulay “Some people die at twenty-five and aren’t buried until they are seventy-five.” ― Benjamin Franklin It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.” ― Bill Murray “Astudy of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.” ― Marty Allen Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.” ― Terry Pratchett “A man who correctly guesses a woman’s age may be smart, but he’s not very bright.” ― Lucille Ball “People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.” ― Otto von Bismarck “Without the will or desire to achieve one is like flotsam on the oceans of time.” ― Steven Redhead “I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious.” ― Michael Scott (Steve Carrell), Movie: The Office “I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think out of the box… I don’t even know where the box is.” “Never complain about the things your parents could not give you… it was probably all they had.” Don’t forget to check out our collection of really funny one-liners about life. You can download the free Funny Words of Wisdom Quotes PDF here and enjoy forwarding it your friends and family to make them laugh out loud and have a great time. ![]() These amusing words of wisdom are really funny and are relatable to married couples, lovers, students, new moms, brides, parents, children, and more and these wise quotes are really witty with a tinge of sarcasm to make you go ROFL. Laughter is the best medicine in life, and these funny inspirational wise words and quotes are guaranteed to brighten your day by putting a big beautiful smile on your face. These quotes are a mix of funny, inspirational, encouraging, motivational, sarcastic, humorous one liners to take life easy and enjoy it while living it. Some encouraging words and life lessons when put forward on a lighter note, then it makes the message clear and uplifts your mood and spirits. Looking for some humorous and funny wise quotes? We have rounded up the best collection of funny words of wisdom, quotes, sayings, funny jokes, phrases, one-liners, captions, status messages, (with images, pictures, meme,) to inspire you with wise words with a pinch of humor.
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